Ways to Reduce School Stress for your Child w/Autism


7 Techniques to Respond to Your Child with Autism for Meaningful Conversation


Autism Conversations

Your child with autism has just initiated something verbal (with words) and/or nonverbal (body language, tone of voice, facial expressions, etc.).  These initiations are totally precious because they are rare and generated by your child after much effort orchestrating multiple requirements for communication. So valuable are your child’s initiations, they deserve productive adult responses as models to further grow their language skills and continue the conversation.  These techniques can help!

1. Acknowledge:  Regardless of how incorrect her initiated sentences might be, whenever naturally appropriate, acknowledge verbally whatever she has said:

“I see.”
“I understand.”

Along with your verbal input, make your nonverbal body language match your words like nodding ‘yes’, tone of voice, and facial expressions.

2.  Emphasize:  Use interjections to add emphasis and animation to your acknowledgment when appropriate:

“Oh, no!”

Children learn by watching and listening to the various models of others, especially when you incorporate what your child has just said.  Your child will naturally imitate your words if he or she chooses.  Respond with short sentences or phrases presented slowly in an audible, clear voice.

After acknowledging and emphasizing, model through incorporation of these three strategies:

3.  Expand: Restate whatever your child says using proper grammar to form a complete sentence.”

Child:  “Car go.”

Adult:  “Yes, the car is going.”


Child:  “Her hungry?”

Adult:  “Hmm…is she hungry?”

4.  Extend: After applying the expansion technique above, add new information.

Child:  “Car go.”

Adult:  “Yes, the car is going.  It’s a fast car!”

Child:  “Baby cry.”

Adult:   “Aw, yeah…the baby is crying. He’s hungry.”

5.  Request imitation:  If your child does not choose to imitate your words on his own, at times you may request his imitation.  Since imitation cannot always be demanded or expected or performed flawlessly by your child, discretion should be used.  Insert pauses in order to make it easier for your child to repeat:

Child:  “Mommy, truck going!”
Adult:  “Oh my goodness, yes!  That truck is going too fast!  Johnny, say, ‘Mommy,’ [pause for your child to repeat] ‘that truck’ [pause] ‘is going’ [pause] ‘too fast!’”

(Immediately following, try to have your child imitate the whole sentence without pausing.)


Child:  “Milk.”
Adult:  “Ok…Sarah, say, ‘Can I have milk, Mom?’” or “Yes…Sarah, say, ‘Mom, I want milk.’”

In situations where your child initiates something vague or inadequate, you can respond to what you think his intention was with these two strategies:

6. Paraphrase: To achieve greater clarity using different words, paraphrasing provides rich input for your child to hear and imprint into his repertoire.

Child:  “Milk.”
Adult:  “Oh!  You want milk.  Ok, here’s a glass of milk.”


Child:  “My shoes?”
Adult:  “Hmm…you are looking for your shoes.  Where are your shoes? Let’s try to find your shoes.”

7.  Evoke clarification: When your child initiates a vague or inadequate request or demand, respond with something factual. This might influence your child to consider using other words to clarify:

Child (as a request for milk): “Milk?”
Adult:  “Yes, that is milk.” Or “M-hmm.  The milk is white.”
Desired clarification from your child: “May I have milk?”


Child (as a demand to turn the TV back on): “TV on!”
Adult:  “No, the TV is not on.  I turned the TV off.”
Desired clarification from your child: “Turn the TV on.”

If your child does not spontaneously produce other words to clarify, you can provide the correct model for imitation (e.g., “Sarah, say, ‘Mom, I want milk.’”), or paraphrase with a request for imitation (e.g., “You want me to turn the TV back on.  Sarah, say, ‘Mom, please turn the TV back on.’”).

With these seven strategies, your child’s priceless initiations can be further developed and reinforced to create more natural, meaningful communication.  Feel free to Email me using the form below to share your experiences and to ask questions.


Five A’s for Autism


World-autism-awareness-dayAccording to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in March 2014, 1 in 68 US children has an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) which is a 30% increase from 1 in 88 two years ago.  With the increase in statistics, naturally intensified concern has been directed towards autism.

The seventh annual World Autism Awareness Day is April 2, 2014. Since 2007, autism organizations around the world celebrate the day with fund-raising and awareness-raising events. It is long-awaited that literally the “world” is becoming “aware” of autism, and, at the same time, it is of the utmost importance to make this awareness both practical and significant. I propose “Five A’s for autism”:

  1. AWARENESS: We have become aware that the diagnoses of autism are on the rise.
    Practicality and significance: More and more people of all ages and backgrounds are affected by this disorder, so it is more likely to touch someone you know.
  1. ATTENTION: Now that we have become aware, we can pay attention to the signs of autism.
    Practicality and significance: Autism can only be diagnosed by observation, so it is up to everyone in the child’s life to be watchful.
  1. ACTION: Once we are aware, we can report what we see and hear to the child’s caregivers, educators, doctors, and family and friends.
    Practicality and significance: The earlier a diagnosis of autism is established, the sooner treatment which involves the help of all of the significant people in the child’s life can begin for the best quality of life.
  1. ACCEPTANCE: While treatment helps the child progress through life, autism presents challenges throughout the lifespan. We need to be sensitive to the differences that people with autism have.
    Practicality and significance: Our focus is on the person, not the disability.
  1. ADVOCACY: When we have become fully aware, attentive, action-oriented, and accepting of the person with autism, we must advocate for them.
    Practicality and significance: At the heart of autism is difficulty relating to other people in society and trouble communicating. Therefore, people with autism rely on us to be their voices and their supporters.

Awareness is absolutely an important first step. Let’s go beyond and keep in mind the “Five A’s” on Autism Awareness Day.  And everyday.